Midlife Crisis Questions for women

Bre Wolfe-The Midlife Crisis Coach

Midlife Crisis? Answers To Your Questions

Welcome to where you can find answers to some of your most burning questions.

I know what is to feels like to feel alone in a crowded room, when you can’t seem to find sure footing emotionally in your everyday routine. I’ve been there and I’ve moved through it not only myself, but I’ve successfully helped countless others through it as well.

Below you’ll find some of the most common questions when deciding if in fact you’re going through a midlife crisis:

 

 

 

“I am sick of my life and I just want to run and leave it all—what do I do?”

First of all–it’s normal to want to runaway sometimes. All your feelings are a message from you to you. It’s how the deepest part of you communicates its deepest truth.

The goal is to uncover what your feelings are trying to tell you.

  1. First start by noticing what triggers the feeling.
  2. Get specific about when you feel that way, get clear on what is causing the feeling—see if it worse at certain times of the day or when you are around a specific person.
  3. Then ask yourself what small healthy thing you can do differently so you will feel less and less of that negative feeling. Wanting to run usually means you want to be free—free so you can be your self. Perhaps the healthy action would be to speak your truth about how you feel, maybe it’s simply saying no.
  4. You need to commit to getting out of your head and into action if you want to alleviate your discomfort. You don’t have to run away to start redesigning your life—I call it throwing out the baby with the bath water—instead you can start getting clear on what you want and then add those things to your list.

Just because you made decisions that served you in the past doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind now. We are constantly evolving beings and making new choices is how we take care of ourselves today.

“Sometimes I just feel so stuck, like I’m doing the same monotonous thing over and over and none of it really matters…is this a midlife issue?”

Anytime you question your life, what you’re doing and why you’re doing it– is a midlife issue.

Examining your life is healthy and necessary.

Socrates said, “the unexamined life is not worth living”, because it is only when we truly see what we want and need that we begin to truly live by consciously contributing our unique gifts to the world and to ourselves.

If life is monotonous, then you need to shake it up a little. You’ve not been living to your highest capacity.

What have you been wanting to do that you’ve been putting off? Begin it now–

“It seems like no matter what I do or what I accomplish, it’s never enough, because I’m still never really happy. Feeling good is only temporary—can I ever really be happy?”

Everyone can be happy—we are as happy as we make up our minds to be–but true happiness is not achieved by looking outside yourself and doing “things”.

True lasting happiness comes when our lives exactly match what we envision for ourselves on the inside.

We become what we think about, so in your quest to accomplish goals, which is perfectly fine in their own right, you must still allow space in your rush ‘to get and do’ to ‘just be’.

I recommend giving yourself five minutes a day to visualize the quality of happiness and how it looks in your life.

Ask yourself some really important questions like how you can cultivate this quality and bring it with you in your pursuits and ask what you can be happy about in your life right now, in other words look around you to see what is working right now.

“I have everything that should make me happy—but I feel so guilty because I’m not and it feels like something is missing.”

When you say something is missing—I have to ask—are you bringing yourself into the mix.

Could you be the thing that is missing?

Sometimes we engage so much in activity that the deepest part of us starts to pull back simply because you are in stress or stimulus overload. So, we disengage emotionally—as a way to counterbalance the stress of doing too much.

When that happens to us, we become robotic in a sense, just getting through the day. Less is more and in our western culture we need to be reminded that we are still worthwhile even when we are doing nothing. In fact we need to remember that the more we pause and regenerate the more powerful we will be in creating a life we are fully engaged in and excited about.

“I’ve been married for ten years now and although I love my husband, I could care less about making love to him. In fact it’s become another chore. I know he needs to be connected sexually, but I dread it every time he touches me. What’s wrong?”

First you need to make sure that what you are feeling isn’t based on changing hormones or health. Once you’ve ruled that out, take a look at the emotional quality of your relationship.

  • Do you feel supported and valued?
  • Are there any long standing resentments that need to be aired?

Each of us has access to only so much energy. Holding on to resentment and grudges rob us of essential energy that could be used to create and form deeper honest bonds with our self and our partner.

Secondly, are you doing so much in your life that you have no left over time for yourself? If that’s the case, STOP—give yourself what you need, whether that is rest, meditation, exercise or doing nothing at all. Having energy or desire for love making is an outpouring of what we give ourselves.

You must create space so you have energy for yourself before you have energy to give to anyone else.

“I’m fat. I hate that word, but I’ve let myself go and I can’t seem to stick to a diet. I start off fine in the morning, but by the end of the day I’ve blown it again and I eat anything and everything because I tell myself I can just start fresh again the next day…it’s a vicious cycle—and I feel totally out of control. What’s wrong with me?”

Nothing is wrong with you—what is happening in your physical experience with eating is merely a direct out picturing of what is happening in your internal world.

First, stop beating yourself up. How human of you. Food is being used as a source of comfort and the more you degrade and shame yourself the more you will reach for food to feel better– even if it is only temporary.

You have the answers inside you as to what will really work for you and binging is more about trying to meet an emotional need than it is about food. Sabotaging your best efforts usually means on some level you don’t believe you deserve what you want. If that is the case then maybe forgiveness work is in order first. Once that’s healed, then you can move forward.

The second step then would be creating new healthier habits in relationship to food. Any and every realistic goal can be reached with the right structures and supports. So set up structures in advance of a binge, list all the alternative actions you will take before you bite into something. It may be calling a friend, taking a walk around the block or whatever you deem do-able.

In terms of supports, ask yourself if you need to join a weight loss and management group. Get tempting foods out of the house, come up with a realistic plan that gives you a structured healthy diet designed to help eliminate cravings. It is your life and once you get clear on exactly how you want to be, look and act, then you can create the supports and structures to help you manifest your ideal healthy sexy vibrant body!

You Don’t Have To Keep Experiencing Frustration, Depression or Overwhelm Anymore

Are you ready to move through these feelings of being stuck, depressed or unhappy?

You don’t have to experience a midlife crisis a day longer. Take the steps today to move through this experience and allow me to support you.

Get answers and begin to feel healing and clarity by downloading my Free Audio Interview & PDF

“The midlife Crisis Coach Answers many of your hard Questions in a comprehensive one-on-one interview you can download now for free, for your personal library”

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